This is an essay I had to write for an exam, I tried to make it as long as I could using one of those generators to fit the standards, it was difficult. can someone revise it for me and tell me if there's anything wrong with it?


It was a breezy yet warm midsummer day on July twenty-fifth 2012, and I essentially was more than yare to relish my summer with my friends. Ash, my (now non binary) friend, was going to be having a birthday beach party at the shores approximately 3 hours away that day. I particularly was genuinely exhilarated in a pretty big way.


I had to get ready within two hours, take a shower, fine-tune my hair, brush my teeth, get one of my bathing suits, and ascertain I had a good amount of sunscreen on. I'm jumbling attempting to get things done as quickly as possible afore we depart from our house, apparel on the floor scattered like broken glass, which is quite significant to what was about to happen.

I'm running like lightning, then, I tripped on some shoes laying around Flat on my face, hard enough to cause the ground to crack. My mother rushes in to visually perceive if I'm okay, and what all the noise was about. She optically canvassed my face, and her ocular perceivers widened, horrified as if she visually perceived a ghost.


I particularly asked her what was erroneous, and she optically canvassed me shocked, I conscientiously brushed the sort of blonde hair out of my face as she still for all intents and purposes had the horrified look on hers. I kind of abstracted my hand from my mouth to later optically actually discern blood on my fingers. I licked around my mouth to for all intents and purposes feel an immensely colossal gap where my fairly canine teeth used to be a minute ago and particularly felt a sharp pain in my gums in a subtle, yet excruciating way.



body

My mom verbalizes, "Oh honey, you lost your baby teeth!" she exclaimed, but I wasn't as happy as she was, I had a party to generally go to in twenty minutes in a fairly major way, and my gums were gushing blood! I didn't want my friends to visually perceive my missing teeth and laugh at me, which is fairly significant. So, I obnubilated in my room and told my mom I didn't wish to go at all anymore. She reassured me, kindly telling me that's BS, and verbally expressed they'd celebrate I'm delicately comely, particularly contrary to my personal belief.



I didn't believe her at first, but, after a couple of minutes of optically canvassing my reflection as my mother ran to find her car keys, I mostly commenced to celebrate. Maybe it wasn't so deplorable, sort of contrary to my past belief. We then went to the dentists, to then get the leftover broken teeth removed from my gums. After a couple of hours, we decided to go despite my missing teeth, and the fact we were super late.



conclusion

mum for the most part was right, contrary to my personal belief. Most everyone didn't care. The next day, I got ridiculed intensely, but marginally. It wasn't proximately as deplorable as I mentally conceived it would be, or so they thought. I now actually like my teeth.